Thursday, 27 February 2014

What been a fat women is really like...

As you may have seen,  Cosmo recently published an article called 'What been a fat women is really like' where two unnamed fat women answered a number of questions. The lovely Claire from A Monkey Fashionista came up with the idea that the #psbloggers should answer the questions and post with the hash tag #cosmoQs

So, here goes!

How do you feel when other women around you complain about feeling/being fat?

The majority of women who I hear say this are a lot smaller than I am.  I understand that everyone feels different in their bodies, but I often feel that saying things like 'oh I am so fat' when your quite obviously not, makes me think that a lot of the time they are just fishing for compliments. 

If they are fat, I actually feel sorry for them. I accept and try to embrace it. I am not defined by my fat and I try and install a sense of self confidence in them.

How has your body image changed since high school? College?

I am much more confident now. I have always been confident and out going, but when I was younger, I think It was a false confidence.  I pretended that nothing bothered me.

Have you tried dieting? What happened?

I think all fat women have dieted at some point.  I definitely have. I have done most diets available.  I have actually recently lost about 2 stone.  This isn't down to dieting. Its down to eating healthier.  For me there is a massive difference between been on a diet and eating healthily.  I eat a balanced diet and most importantly to me is that I know what I am eating.  95% of what I eat is cooked from scratch. I don't deprive myself of anything.  If I want it, I eat it!

Do you think in your case your weight is partly or entirely genetic?

I suppose there is a case to say yes and no.My Nana was very overweight before she past away. My mum was a size 18/20 until her mid 30s. My brother and sister where both overweight as children.  But my auntie, my mums sister, is a size 4. My uncle, also on my mums size, is over 6ft and very slim. I guess its impossible to say.

Do you consider yourself healthy? Have there been instances where people assumed you were unhealthy?

I not unhealthy but I admit I am unfit. As I said previously,  I eat a healthy diet and don't have any weight related health problems so to speak.

I think its just a general presumption that all fat people are unhealthy... its all the media's fault!

Are your parents both supportive of you at the weight you're at? Have they always been?

This Is a funny one for me. My family have never said I needed to loose weight,  but when I have been on a diet in the past, I get the general comments like 'you look so much better with a bit of weight off'.

How do you think retailers can improve clothes for plus-size people?

The UK plus size market is beyond poor. Thankfully we have a few places that are amazing, and there seems to new a new plus size brand every week. What earks me is the fact that the most are ridiculous priced! I want the same choice as an average size women and at the same price!!

Do you think plus-size women are judged differently than plus-sized men are? How? 

I am not a plus size man, so cant really answer this question. I do feel that plus size men are generally more accepted though. 

Do you think there’s an assumption made/stereotype that exists about plus-size people? How would you respond to it?

YES!! They majority of people think that fat people are lazy, greedy, unhealthy, sad, depressed, lonely, easy etc etc… If people are stupid enough to judge a person before they know them, more fool them. 

Do you think there’s ever a right way or time to express concern about someone’s weight? 

Yes and no. I think if a person is actually ill from weight then I can understand concern from friends of family member. From a stranger. No. Never. 

What are the worst things people have said to you about your body?

I guess I am quite lucky in the fact that I can't really remember a time that I have actually been abused  or taunted for my weight. Partly because the only time I some one did, I broke his nose and partly because I try and avoid putting myself in the situation where I could be taunted. Obviously, I occasional get the odd name calling in the street and when I am out etc etc.

What have people said (or do you wish they’d say) that would compliment your body or appearance?

I don't take compliments well due to years of self loathing. If I get compliments I smile politely, say thank you and go bright red! I think secretly every girl wants to be called beautiful occasionally.

Do you find yourself hanging out with women who are closer to your size? 

My friends vary from a size 6 to a size 30. I guess I have more plus size friends now, but I don't intentional go out looking for fat people to make friends with!

How has your weight affected your sex life, if at all?

I don't think it has. I had regular sex with different men from the age of 16 to 21 when I met my boyfriend. My sex life now is just a regular and better than ever!

When you've been single, has your weight affected your dating life?

Nope. I had my heart broke when I was 16 and never meet anyone I wanted to be in a relationship with until I met my boyfriend.

Do you feel weird if the guy you’re with only dates larger women

Nope, I don't think so. I know I am the largest women my boyfriend has been with and him the same of me.

Do you feel weird if he's only dated slimmer women before you? 

Again, Nope.

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